hard to be systematic
i would say it's hard to stay logical, systematic, non-flawed as an individual organizing something. coding is one of the cases. i've never thought my interest of sorting things out can be just out of control like when i try to put the lines sustainably in place without having to fix them so much.
just realize so does my life is. i've always wanted to have everything as in order as possible. that's my way of letting myself satisfied. actually, after clearing chaotic mess out, the feeling is just great. i pursuit that sensation, in and out. my day would be fulfilled when tasks have been well put. now i just need to learn to accept how life's events piles up and troubleshoot them day by day. what is the english word that designates the action of untie messy laces? i wanted to use it but never mind. the thing is, my stubborn head will be in that state again, obligating myself to seek perfection, which is impossible.
the hate peeves are always there. no way to remove it out of the line. just accept the loser that i am sometimes. is untangle the word? everything is dancing around my brain and it makes me feel like giving up. hey, i have an idea. why don't we go to a place where it's the same place as we're in today? i hope it makes sense, the one we just talked about this morning is nonsensical by the way. don't be weird, i'm just here, lift that red underline up and head out to avenir.
god bless.